On a sunny Sunday morning in March, a small, what seemed slightly unenthusiastic group of hashers gathered- the previous nights frivolities including beer, music and the opposite sex could perhaps be blamed, but poor weather as with the last few Hashes could not.
 
We set off after a non-brief by Atomic Caton and Pick me up, across a flat, uninspiring landscape, overlooked by Heysham power station, soon splitting, Wimps off to the left, Rambo's straight ahead into the far yonder!!
 
We followed the well-marked trail until we were slightly bemused in one field, were the hares either still under the influence of alcohol or obviously barking mad. The trail being placed on top of cow plats in a zig zag up the field, which we were later informed by Atomic Caton was designed to make it more interesting!!??
 
After the group rejoined, we proceeded along the road reciting horror stories about the old Butlins camp to a well-deserved beer stop on the mud flats... sorry... beach??
 
A reluctant group set off again along the beach, admiring the vast amounts of minging rubbish strewn along the tide line, when over the sound of heavy breathing a Mickey Mouse tune rang out!! After a hurried look at ones own phone and scan round to direct abuse at the culprit, it became apparent that Moby Dick was living up to his name. A short conversation to whom we thought was a taxi driver being given secret rendezvous point for a ride to the on inn!!!
 
The hash group split again, a long haul along the shoreline, round Sunderland point regrouping for the legg-it back towards the on inn, only to have our obvious giddiness and frivolity to be dashed when we realised the trail took a 90 degree turn to the right, then up a blooming big hill!! On reaching the trig point at the top we were well rewarded by a glorious view and a bit of healthy banter- Bubbles having had the Blue Watch warped sense of humour explained to him, i.e. stating the bleeding obvious, he then proceeded upon being asked, to explain what a trig point was until he realised he'd been had!! A welcome breather before the short run back to the on inn.
 
After a short while, the circle formed and P-dough produced the now customary ice block (once he had battered it trying to extract it from the bucket!) No More Cum then decided a demo was required, immediate drop of the pants, bare of arse to whole world (well those trying to eat in the pub veranda) placing of bare arse and gonads on the ice... not nice??!! Those sinners invited into the ring; -

• The GM and Morticia for their apparent bad dress code, the wearing of the wife's hash t shirt, and no socks respectively  
• The hares Atomic Caton + Pick me up sharing the ice, for the zig zag trail
• Moby Dick was renamed after a dodgy vote to Moby Dickhead
• Baldcock for his apparent warped sense of humour and being stood the closest to the RA